A student who was calm is suddenly angry. A student who was friendly is suddenly silent. Discipline addresses the behavior. Curiosity can find the cause.
Questions before consequences
- When did you first notice the change?
- What happened in the days before it started?
- Is it happening in every class or only some?
- Who does the student trust most at school?
What to do next
Share what you noticed without judgment: “I’ve noticed you seem different lately. I’m not here to punish you. I want to understand what’s going on.” Then agree on one next step, such as a counselor visit or a schedule adjustment.
Consequences may still be necessary. The goal is to pair them with a real attempt to understand what is behind the behavior.
Read: Five reasons students leave, and what helps →
Related reading
- Attendance Starts With Connection
- School Bullying: What Educators May Be Missing
- Educator Resource Center
Educational guidance only. Requirements vary by state and district. If a student may be in danger, follow your school’s safety procedures and contact emergency services (911) or crisis support (call or text 988 in the U.S.).
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